she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Please don't give away my fajitas
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
