if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
We are all done wearing pants today
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
