Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize