People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
