How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
