WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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