he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize