My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
