is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
