she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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