Porn is love you can see.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
