The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I deserve this hangover.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
