quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
