been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
