i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
