Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
