she was so not down for the gang bang
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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