Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
well you can't waste a boner
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Randomize
