Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
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