I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I woke up under a house in Key West
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
