yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
