There was a lot of him and a little penis
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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