Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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