He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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