I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
