Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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