Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
