Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
