people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
she peed on how many people?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
