i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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