no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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