Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
