so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
How external is "for external use only"?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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