I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
