in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize