dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
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