Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
We are all done wearing pants today
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
