The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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