I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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