How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Randomize
