If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Just cropdusted the office
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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