Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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