I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
