She's JV to your varsity
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
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