That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
