Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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