Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
