He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
