Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
