I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Randomize
