And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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