He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
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