I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Fuck me I smell like cheese
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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