So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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