Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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